1 00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:18,340 Here you go. I got that. 2 00:00:18,393 --> 00:00:20,729 Oh, thank you. You know, I can't lift things. I... 3 00:00:20,812 --> 00:00:22,147 I'm disabled! 4 00:00:22,230 --> 00:00:24,774 Oh. Yeah, I'm really sorry about that. 5 00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:26,234 Oh, I was... I was kidding. 6 00:00:26,317 --> 00:00:28,570 Oh! 7 00:00:28,653 --> 00:00:30,905 Wait, what is there to do in Ojai anyway? 8 00:00:30,989 --> 00:00:31,990 Oh, Ravi. Oh, sorry. 9 00:00:32,073 --> 00:00:34,909 It's sort of like nature, but, like, make it rich. 10 00:00:37,787 --> 00:00:39,164 Oh, uh... 11 00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:41,708 Yeah, no. Don't worry about it. I got it. 12 00:00:42,459 --> 00:00:44,252 Wouldn't want you to break a nail. 13 00:00:44,335 --> 00:00:45,712 Little bitches. 14 00:00:45,795 --> 00:00:47,130 Oh, also, just to warn you, 15 00:00:47,213 --> 00:00:50,467 I chopped up all my credit cards and put myself on a serious budget. 16 00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:52,844 I'm determined to only spend $50 this weekend. 17 00:00:52,927 --> 00:00:54,888 I'm so proud of you. 18 00:00:54,971 --> 00:00:59,434 But, um, actually, we had 40 bucks budgeted each for groceries, so I don't... 19 00:00:59,517 --> 00:01:01,519 Tight, tight, tight. I'm not going outside. 20 00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:05,315 Oh, shoot. Did I forget my lip gloss? 21 00:01:05,398 --> 00:01:08,276 Gosh, Kim, why is no one ready? 22 00:01:08,359 --> 00:01:11,196 - Why is no one ready? - Why is no one ready? 23 00:01:11,279 --> 00:01:13,198 Okay, what's happening? 24 00:01:13,281 --> 00:01:16,409 - Why is everybody saying that? - Ryan. 25 00:01:16,493 --> 00:01:17,619 Explain please. 26 00:01:17,702 --> 00:01:21,623 We were doing Meryl Streep's iconic line reading from Devil Wears Prada, and... 27 00:01:21,706 --> 00:01:25,293 We were trying to, but we can't do it, because she's Meryl and a genius. 28 00:01:25,376 --> 00:01:28,338 - Right, yeah. Nah, I've never seen it. - What?! 29 00:01:28,963 --> 00:01:30,256 Okay, sorry! 30 00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,217 - He's been inside of me. - I feel attacked. 31 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:35,553 - Whoa! Just a straight man. Don't hurt me. - You know what? It's fine. 32 00:01:35,637 --> 00:01:38,431 It's what this trip is for, to reach across and educate. 33 00:01:38,515 --> 00:01:39,808 Uh-oh! 34 00:01:39,891 --> 00:01:42,018 Found it! Let's go. 35 00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:43,102 All right. 36 00:01:44,729 --> 00:01:47,857 Why? Why is no one ready? 37 00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:50,985 - Why is no one ready? - Wow, this is like gay porn. 38 00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,780 I'm gonna get it. I am going to get it. 39 00:01:53,863 --> 00:01:57,117 Let's go! Gay porn. That's a compliment, right? 40 00:01:57,200 --> 00:01:58,368 We love gay porn. 41 00:02:13,424 --> 00:02:15,009 What the fuck? 42 00:02:17,846 --> 00:02:20,849 Okay, two twin beds. 43 00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:24,269 How about you be Kabir, and I'll be Dasya? 44 00:02:24,352 --> 00:02:25,854 Or we could both be Dasya. 45 00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:28,481 Then we would have an entire bed just for our things. 46 00:02:28,565 --> 00:02:31,234 - Which is very glamorous, don't you think? - Maybe. 47 00:02:35,822 --> 00:02:39,367 - Babe, you're kind of squishing me. - Yeah? 48 00:02:39,450 --> 00:02:40,535 Okay. 49 00:02:44,372 --> 00:02:46,082 Sorry, um... 50 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:48,835 I need to do a wellness check on us. Are we okay? 51 00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:50,712 What? Yeah, of course. 52 00:02:50,795 --> 00:02:53,882 I just... I know we had a little bit of a baby fight at prom, and... 53 00:02:53,965 --> 00:02:56,050 Babe, we're fine. 54 00:02:56,134 --> 00:03:00,054 In fact, we're so fine that I'm fully prepared to share a twin bed with you. 55 00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:03,766 Like, right now? 56 00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:06,060 Yeah. Like, really right now. 57 00:03:06,144 --> 00:03:07,984 Am I still squishing you? 58 00:03:28,750 --> 00:03:30,376 Welcome to Casa Verde. 59 00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:33,254 Wow! This is stunning. 60 00:03:33,338 --> 00:03:36,299 - Yeah, well, I put a lot of love into her. - Huh. 61 00:03:36,382 --> 00:03:38,426 So, uh, what brings you to Carmel? 62 00:03:38,509 --> 00:03:41,596 Well, it's a little treat to myself. 63 00:03:41,679 --> 00:03:47,060 I'm 50, and I have never been away by myself before. 64 00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:48,394 - Isn't that crazy? - Hm. 65 00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:51,940 So I thought I would maybe go to a fancy dinner, 66 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:54,442 do a little dancing. 67 00:03:54,525 --> 00:03:57,237 Gonna use your pool. I might even go shopping. 68 00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:58,821 Do you know of a cute boutique? 69 00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:00,490 Yeah, that all sounds great. 70 00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:02,700 Listen, just one small thing. 71 00:04:03,326 --> 00:04:07,163 My neighbors are kinda nosy, so if anybody asks, 72 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,873 you're Jenna, 73 00:04:08,957 --> 00:04:10,750 my cousin from Minnesota. 74 00:04:12,043 --> 00:04:14,963 - Okay. - Jenna from Minnesota. 75 00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:17,590 Also, the TV doesn't work. I disconnected the cable. 76 00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:20,385 I don't need another way for the government to watch me. 77 00:04:21,469 --> 00:04:22,553 Watch you do what? 78 00:04:23,972 --> 00:04:25,223 I think I've said enough. 79 00:04:27,725 --> 00:04:30,770 - Okay, you guys. One more question. - Easy. 80 00:04:30,853 --> 00:04:34,357 Who's most likely to experience paranormal activity? 81 00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:35,275 - Oh! - Oh, come on. 82 00:04:35,358 --> 00:04:36,943 You wanna tell 'em the story? 83 00:04:37,026 --> 00:04:39,946 Oh, you mean the story of how I really lost my virginity? 84 00:04:40,029 --> 00:04:41,155 Did you fuck a ghost? 85 00:04:41,239 --> 00:04:42,239 No! 86 00:04:42,573 --> 00:04:44,325 He fucked me. 87 00:04:44,409 --> 00:04:46,327 - What? - He was huge! 88 00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:48,288 Okay, we get it. You have herstory. 89 00:04:48,371 --> 00:04:50,915 Now it's our turn, and we're gonna beat your asses. 90 00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:51,833 Good luck to you. 91 00:04:51,916 --> 00:04:54,294 - Too masc? - A little masc, but it was hot. 92 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:57,380 - Okay. First question. - Okay. 93 00:04:57,463 --> 00:04:59,799 Who's most likely to get scammed? 94 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:03,720 - Oh, no points for you. - What? 95 00:05:03,803 --> 00:05:07,098 I almost joined Scientology because they gave me a delicious free brunch. 96 00:05:07,181 --> 00:05:10,268 I actually joined Andrew Keegan's beach cult in Venice for two weeks 97 00:05:10,351 --> 00:05:11,644 'cause everybody was so hot. 98 00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:13,980 - He got a beach cult? - Google it. 99 00:05:14,063 --> 00:05:15,440 Okay, guys, moving on. 100 00:05:17,191 --> 00:05:21,904 Who's most likely to be clumsy-dumsy and fall or break somethin'? 101 00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:24,574 No point. 102 00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:25,533 - What? - I... 103 00:05:25,616 --> 00:05:28,161 Bitch, I'm disabled! I trip all the time. 104 00:05:28,244 --> 00:05:31,539 In dance, they called me "Butterfingers." I got injured once a month. 105 00:05:31,622 --> 00:05:33,333 How can you be clumsy and a dancer? 106 00:05:33,416 --> 00:05:35,960 - Okay, last question! - Give us one more. 107 00:05:36,044 --> 00:05:42,008 Which one of you is most likely to win a dance competition? 108 00:05:43,134 --> 00:05:45,094 - Ding, ding! There you go. - Whoo! 109 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:48,306 You just gave that one to us, but thank you. 110 00:05:48,389 --> 00:05:49,599 Well, we got it. 111 00:05:49,682 --> 00:05:50,682 Huh. 112 00:06:19,670 --> 00:06:21,339 Sorry. 113 00:06:24,717 --> 00:06:25,551 Oh my God, babe. 114 00:06:25,635 --> 00:06:26,844 - I'm sorry. - It's fine. 115 00:06:26,928 --> 00:06:28,721 - Just, fuck this bed. - Fuck this bed. 116 00:06:30,056 --> 00:06:31,057 Come here. 117 00:06:31,140 --> 00:06:33,017 Oh, sorry. I hit you in the face. 118 00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:34,811 - It's fine. I liked it. - Okay. 119 00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:50,909 I think... 120 00:06:51,619 --> 00:06:52,912 I think I wanna top. 121 00:06:53,621 --> 00:06:55,164 - Are you sure? - Yeah. 122 00:06:55,248 --> 00:06:56,749 Is there, um, lube? 123 00:06:56,833 --> 00:06:57,833 - Yes. - Okay. 124 00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:01,671 - Oh, okay. - Look what I have. 125 00:07:03,005 --> 00:07:04,006 Okay. 126 00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:11,388 Okay. 127 00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:12,849 All right. 128 00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:15,893 Okay. 129 00:07:18,771 --> 00:07:20,314 - Am I in? - Oh, you're in, babe. 130 00:07:20,398 --> 00:07:21,524 Oh! 131 00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:22,608 - I'm in. - We're in. 132 00:07:22,692 --> 00:07:24,569 - We're fully in. Oh! - Oh! 133 00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:31,826 - I think I'm gonna cum. - Gimme all your cum. 134 00:07:31,909 --> 00:07:33,828 - Oh, fuck yeah. - Give it to me. 135 00:07:40,376 --> 00:07:42,670 That's my boy! 136 00:07:42,753 --> 00:07:44,839 Are you kidding me? You did it! 137 00:07:44,922 --> 00:07:47,467 - Thank you. - I think you have a future in topping. 138 00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:49,635 Oh, wow. That's so sweet. 139 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:51,637 I'm not sweet. I'm honest. 140 00:07:58,060 --> 00:07:58,978 Do you smell that? 141 00:08:03,274 --> 00:08:04,275 Is that... 142 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:06,485 Is that shit? 143 00:08:07,069 --> 00:08:08,069 Maybe. 144 00:08:08,529 --> 00:08:10,990 I'd have douched, but I didn't know it was on the menu. 145 00:08:11,073 --> 00:08:12,742 Oh my God! Ew! 146 00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,077 Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew! 147 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:17,830 Oh my God, oh my God! Ew, ew, ew! 148 00:08:22,668 --> 00:08:24,670 Honestly? 149 00:08:24,754 --> 00:08:25,754 No notes. 150 00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:30,009 Really? That's awesome, 'cause I got so many notes for myself. 151 00:08:31,093 --> 00:08:34,847 I just wanted to make, like, maybe less eye contact? 152 00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:35,931 Yeah. 153 00:08:37,433 --> 00:08:38,433 Okay. 154 00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:41,437 That was insane. 155 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:44,190 Topping? I know. It's like a hug for your penis. 156 00:08:44,273 --> 00:08:46,484 No. You shitting on my dick. 157 00:08:46,567 --> 00:08:49,612 Well, congratulations. You have an amazing, cooperative asshole. 158 00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:52,865 But I've had a lot more sex than you, so just trust me, okay? 159 00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:54,825 - This happens a lot. - Really? 160 00:08:55,326 --> 00:08:57,036 Gosh, how often does it happen? 161 00:08:57,119 --> 00:09:01,707 I clean there regardless, no matter what's on the sexual agenda, so... 162 00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:05,503 Ryan, what are you trying to do here? Make me feel bad? I'm sorry, okay? 163 00:09:06,170 --> 00:09:09,549 When you weren't able to top me before, I didn't make a huge deal about it. 164 00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:13,385 Okay. 165 00:09:13,803 --> 00:09:15,096 Do you want, like, a medal? 166 00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:25,064 Oh, we're just... Separate beds. 167 00:09:32,738 --> 00:09:33,739 Night. Love you. 168 00:09:35,700 --> 00:09:36,700 Love you. 169 00:09:53,759 --> 00:09:55,136 What do you wanna do today? 170 00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:58,222 I did some Googling, and there's a woman named Ingrid 171 00:09:58,306 --> 00:10:00,850 who talks to you about your past lives for $160 an hour. 172 00:10:00,933 --> 00:10:04,186 Actually, I was feeling inspired to write this morning, 173 00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:06,897 so I think I'm gonna do that. Is that cool? 174 00:10:06,981 --> 00:10:10,610 I'll join you. I think I'm gonna low-key start applying for new jobs. 175 00:10:10,693 --> 00:10:14,488 - When do you think you'll be done? - Hmm, not sure. Maybe, like, 1:00? 176 00:10:15,323 --> 00:10:16,949 Okay. Have fun. 177 00:10:17,533 --> 00:10:19,619 It's writing. It's never fun. 178 00:10:20,953 --> 00:10:23,497 There you go. Just a splash. 179 00:10:23,581 --> 00:10:26,459 - What are you doing? - Putting almond milk in your coffee. 180 00:10:27,168 --> 00:10:29,253 - I didn't ask you to do that. - I know. 181 00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:33,633 But I know that you like it, so I took initiative. 182 00:10:38,012 --> 00:10:40,556 That was too couple-y a move, right? Freaked you out? 183 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:45,269 Okay, well, maybe that just means that it's time to let you know that, uh... 184 00:10:47,063 --> 00:10:49,273 I might be down with that. You know? 185 00:10:49,357 --> 00:10:51,359 You and I. Us. 186 00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:54,028 Dating. 187 00:10:54,111 --> 00:10:55,655 'Cause that would be... 188 00:10:57,948 --> 00:10:59,909 Ooh. You're spooked. 189 00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:00,992 Uh... 190 00:11:01,619 --> 00:11:04,455 Can you please blink? Lubricate the eyes? Okay. 191 00:11:04,538 --> 00:11:06,832 Great. Awesome. Uh, I'm gonna go. 192 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,709 And you get to process, 193 00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:11,462 because I'm gonna give you space to do that. 194 00:11:11,545 --> 00:11:15,675 Take it in. Take it in. Talk to your boys. Ask them, uh, what they think, okay? 195 00:11:17,593 --> 00:11:22,181 And I will walk away now. Hey, Tanner, you wanna get in the hot tub? 196 00:11:22,264 --> 00:11:25,393 - You wanna hook up with me? - Ah, we'll see what happens. 197 00:11:52,086 --> 00:11:54,964 Job hunting is so depressing. 198 00:11:55,047 --> 00:11:57,883 I just applied for an assistant position at The Cut. 199 00:11:57,967 --> 00:11:58,968 Assistant! 200 00:11:59,593 --> 00:12:01,929 Are you really thinking of leaving Eggwoke? 201 00:12:02,012 --> 00:12:03,012 Yeah. 202 00:12:04,056 --> 00:12:06,100 I just feel like I'm in a hipster sweatshop, 203 00:12:06,183 --> 00:12:09,353 and Olivia's just hovering above me, breathing down my neck, 204 00:12:09,437 --> 00:12:11,897 demanding I write a listicle about my back fat. 205 00:12:12,523 --> 00:12:13,733 I need a drink. 206 00:12:13,816 --> 00:12:16,318 Why don't you have one with Ravi in the hot tub? 207 00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:17,820 Oh, fuck, yeah! 208 00:12:17,903 --> 00:12:18,903 No. 209 00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:21,490 Kimberly, what is going on with you? 210 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:24,368 You wear sweatpants around Ravi. I know you like him. 211 00:12:24,452 --> 00:12:26,412 Look, Ravi is just one of my best friends 212 00:12:26,495 --> 00:12:28,914 that I also happen to love having sex with. 213 00:12:28,998 --> 00:12:31,041 That's how most people describe their husbands. 214 00:12:31,959 --> 00:12:35,171 Kim, you deserve a nice thing. 215 00:12:35,254 --> 00:12:38,174 And, Ravi, he's a nice thing. 216 00:12:41,135 --> 00:12:42,135 Come here. 217 00:12:46,348 --> 00:12:47,850 What am I seeing? 218 00:12:47,933 --> 00:12:50,060 - Get off me! - Oh my God. 219 00:12:50,144 --> 00:12:52,188 Oh my God, I see the writing's going well. 220 00:12:52,271 --> 00:12:53,898 It's going good. Yeah. 221 00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:56,025 Cool. Well, it's 1:00 now. 222 00:12:58,277 --> 00:12:59,320 It's 1:00 p.m. 223 00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:04,241 Right. Um, what do you feel like doing? 224 00:13:06,327 --> 00:13:08,996 - I just can't. - I think it's realistic. 225 00:13:09,079 --> 00:13:11,457 It makes you laugh. 226 00:13:11,540 --> 00:13:13,209 That's true. That is true. 227 00:13:14,710 --> 00:13:17,338 - You are hysterical. - No, it's not! 228 00:13:17,421 --> 00:13:19,507 - Yes... - Here you are, ma'am. 229 00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:20,800 Oh, please! 230 00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:22,635 - Realistic! - Not in mine. 231 00:13:22,718 --> 00:13:24,470 - Come on. - Miss? 232 00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:30,768 Miss? We're having a slight debate here. We were wondering if you would settle it? 233 00:13:30,851 --> 00:13:33,437 Do you think the movie Book Club was realistic? 234 00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:36,941 Diane Keaton is getting elder abused by her daughters. 235 00:13:37,024 --> 00:13:40,361 They think she's too feeble to live on her own, or something. 236 00:13:40,444 --> 00:13:43,322 And, for God's sake, she is our age. 237 00:13:43,405 --> 00:13:45,407 Nobody is gonna abuse me. 238 00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:48,202 Unless I ask for it. 239 00:13:49,203 --> 00:13:54,542 I-I love any movie where Diane Keaton plays a character named Diane. 240 00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:55,709 And does things like... 241 00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:04,218 Are you by yourself? 242 00:14:04,301 --> 00:14:06,095 - You should join us. - Please! 243 00:14:06,178 --> 00:14:07,680 Oh, okay. 244 00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:17,022 After texting my friend condolences for her cat dying, 245 00:14:17,106 --> 00:14:21,569 I found out that "LOL" does not mean "lots of love." 246 00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:24,780 No, it does not! 247 00:14:24,864 --> 00:14:28,701 You are hysterical! So where are you from? 248 00:14:28,784 --> 00:14:32,413 Los Angeles. Well, just outside. Agoura Hills. 249 00:14:32,496 --> 00:14:34,874 I slept with someone from Agoura Hills. 250 00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:38,502 It was 1994, right after the Northridge earthquake. 251 00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:41,922 I had never experienced this thing called edging. 252 00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:43,799 Hey, Charles! 253 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,886 Do... Do you like it there in Agoura Hills? 254 00:14:46,969 --> 00:14:49,680 - Edging? - No, please. Do you like it there? 255 00:14:49,763 --> 00:14:52,141 Well, you drive through there, you could be anywhere. 256 00:14:52,224 --> 00:14:56,854 You could be in Michigan. You could be in Arizona. You could be in Florida. 257 00:14:56,937 --> 00:14:58,856 But it's nice. 258 00:14:58,939 --> 00:15:02,693 I just redecorated my house. It's where my life is. 259 00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:04,612 Kids? 260 00:15:04,695 --> 00:15:06,572 One. He's grown. 261 00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:09,867 What about you? How do you know each other? 262 00:15:09,950 --> 00:15:13,412 We all sing in a choir together called Voices of a Certain Age. 263 00:15:13,495 --> 00:15:17,416 We perform all around town. Holiday fairs, events at Carmel Plaza... 264 00:15:17,499 --> 00:15:20,377 In our living rooms when we're sad and desperate. 265 00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:23,923 Oh, that sounds fun. I sing. 266 00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:25,758 N-not professionally. 267 00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:30,220 - I, uh, I sang in choir in college, so... - Oh! 268 00:15:30,304 --> 00:15:34,892 Well, since Elaine left to start her jewelry line in Santa Fe, 269 00:15:34,975 --> 00:15:37,269 we've been looking for an alto. 270 00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:44,652 Oh! 271 00:15:44,735 --> 00:15:46,153 You got the job! 272 00:15:49,531 --> 00:15:52,117 Do you wanna come to my Airbnb tonight? 273 00:15:52,201 --> 00:15:54,954 Oh, wait, that's silly. You probably have things to do. 274 00:15:55,037 --> 00:15:56,538 No, honey, we'd be delighted. 275 00:15:57,206 --> 00:15:58,958 - Oh! - We're sad. We're desperate. 276 00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:01,251 Hey, speak for yourself. 277 00:16:01,919 --> 00:16:04,296 Cheers. Yeah. 278 00:16:04,380 --> 00:16:07,466 Okay, I agree, the prostate is the male pleasure center, 279 00:16:07,549 --> 00:16:10,803 and, as a straight man, it's my duty to explore it. 280 00:16:10,886 --> 00:16:12,179 Okay? Happy? 281 00:16:12,262 --> 00:16:13,472 - Yes. - Very. 282 00:16:13,555 --> 00:16:15,641 - Are you doing it again? - Doing what? 283 00:16:15,724 --> 00:16:18,018 Making sure none of the food on your plate touches? 284 00:16:18,102 --> 00:16:19,144 Oh my God. 285 00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:22,773 Okay, I'm sorry. It's gross when someone's eating three separate things 286 00:16:22,856 --> 00:16:25,275 and they just mush 'em all up together like that. 287 00:16:25,359 --> 00:16:27,236 Okay, no one's judging you. 288 00:16:27,319 --> 00:16:30,072 Did you know she's been doing this since she was two years old? 289 00:16:30,155 --> 00:16:32,116 - Aww, is that when you two met? - Yup. 290 00:16:32,199 --> 00:16:34,535 In a literal sandbox, wow. 291 00:16:34,618 --> 00:16:35,786 You were like, "Hi." 292 00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:37,746 How'd you two meet? 293 00:16:38,622 --> 00:16:40,124 Oh, um... 294 00:16:40,207 --> 00:16:42,710 Well, it was a traditional meet-cute, you know? 295 00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:44,169 I mean, boy meets boy, 296 00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:47,506 boy tells boy he has a boyfriend, they hook up anyway. 297 00:16:47,589 --> 00:16:50,009 Okay, wait, just to clarify, this was not cheating. 298 00:16:50,092 --> 00:16:52,886 Richard, my ex, and I, we had a little arrangement where, 299 00:16:52,970 --> 00:16:55,264 while he traveled, I could hook up with whoever. 300 00:16:55,347 --> 00:16:56,181 That's hot. 301 00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:57,182 - Calm down. - Okay. 302 00:16:57,266 --> 00:16:59,685 Anyway, when we first met, his ex was traveling a lot, 303 00:16:59,768 --> 00:17:02,271 so we got to spend every night together. 304 00:17:02,354 --> 00:17:03,188 - Aww. - Yeah. 305 00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:05,149 But when he came back, Tanner was like, 306 00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:07,943 "By the way, I can't see you at all when Richard's in town, 307 00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:09,069 so see ya in a month." 308 00:17:09,153 --> 00:17:11,739 And, uh, that was fun. 309 00:17:11,822 --> 00:17:14,033 Um, no, that... Yeah. 310 00:17:14,116 --> 00:17:16,744 - That's not exactly how I told you. - Yes, it is. 311 00:17:16,827 --> 00:17:20,622 And I came to you all upset and told you I wanted to stop seeing you, 312 00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:22,624 and you, like, wouldn't let me. 313 00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:25,794 I really liked you. I wanted to find a way to make it work. 314 00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:27,588 And we did stop seeing each other. 315 00:17:28,088 --> 00:17:31,675 Well, yeah, but, like, only because I, like, begged you to. 316 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:35,637 - Yeah, and we stopped seeing each other. - Yeah. 317 00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:41,393 - Anyway, um, the story has a happy ending. - Yeah. 318 00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:42,519 - Right. - Yeah. 319 00:17:42,603 --> 00:17:48,233 Well, yeah, 'cause obviously Tanner broke up with Richard to be with me, so... 320 00:17:48,317 --> 00:17:51,278 And here they are, see? Romantic. 321 00:17:51,361 --> 00:17:52,361 Yeah. 322 00:17:57,910 --> 00:18:00,412 ♪ Now that you're gone ♪ 323 00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:05,250 ♪ All that's left is a band of gold ♪ 324 00:18:05,834 --> 00:18:09,838 ♪ All that's left of the dreams I hold ♪ 325 00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:12,174 ♪ Is a band of gold ♪ 326 00:18:12,257 --> 00:18:14,384 ♪ And the memories ♪ 327 00:18:14,468 --> 00:18:16,553 ♪ Of what love could be ♪ 328 00:18:17,137 --> 00:18:19,223 ♪ If you were still... ♪ 329 00:18:19,306 --> 00:18:20,306 Excuse me! 330 00:18:22,017 --> 00:18:24,019 It is 8:30 at night... 331 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:26,271 ...and you are being very loud. 332 00:18:26,355 --> 00:18:27,940 8:30? 333 00:18:28,023 --> 00:18:29,733 Is... Is that late? 334 00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:35,322 I told Jerry if he had any more Airbnbers, I'd call the city on him. 335 00:18:35,405 --> 00:18:36,573 We're not from Airbnb. 336 00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:38,659 - Oh, really? - Yes, really. 337 00:18:38,742 --> 00:18:42,996 And I don't appreciate the insinuation that I am not a truthful person. 338 00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:45,290 How would you feel if your next-door neighbor 339 00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:47,417 was renting their house to complete strangers 340 00:18:47,501 --> 00:18:50,295 who have no regard for anyone else's well-being? 341 00:18:51,713 --> 00:18:56,885 I think I have endless regard for other people's well-being. 342 00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:00,848 This is the first vacation I have taken in 30 years 343 00:19:00,931 --> 00:19:04,351 because I was raising a kid with cerebral palsy, 344 00:19:04,434 --> 00:19:09,022 and then taking care of my mother who had dementia and died. 345 00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:14,027 So excuse me while I experience some fucking joy for once in my life 346 00:19:14,111 --> 00:19:17,322 and dance to music with my beautiful friends. 347 00:19:20,659 --> 00:19:21,827 And my name is Jenna. 348 00:19:21,910 --> 00:19:24,246 And I am Jerry's cousin from Minnesota. 349 00:19:24,329 --> 00:19:26,331 And I will turn down the music. 350 00:19:28,834 --> 00:19:29,834 Okay. 351 00:19:38,594 --> 00:19:39,845 Wow! 352 00:19:40,804 --> 00:19:42,306 Was that all true? 353 00:19:42,389 --> 00:19:44,266 My name is not Jenna. 354 00:19:44,349 --> 00:19:46,059 Well, shit! 355 00:19:46,143 --> 00:19:49,354 Karen, I had you pegged as a delicate flower. 356 00:19:49,438 --> 00:19:51,940 You're a tough little lady, aren't you? 357 00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:53,150 Just... just a little. 358 00:19:54,234 --> 00:19:57,404 Aww, thank you for being so sweet, 359 00:19:57,487 --> 00:20:02,284 for taking me under your wing, and making me part of your tribe. 360 00:20:02,367 --> 00:20:03,744 Yes. 361 00:20:04,411 --> 00:20:07,748 You have to stay another night. Charles roasts a chicken on Sunday nights. 362 00:20:07,831 --> 00:20:11,543 - You have to come. - It's like a Nancy Meyers movie. 363 00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:14,796 Bunch of old folks hanging out in an impossibly gorgeous kitchen. 364 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:18,425 Better than a Nancy Meyers movie because we're not all white. 365 00:20:21,094 --> 00:20:23,722 Oh, I wish I could. I can't. I gotta go home. 366 00:20:23,805 --> 00:20:25,474 - Aww. - I have things to do. 367 00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:29,144 But I am here right now, and I wanna dance! 368 00:20:32,522 --> 00:20:36,902 ♪ In the darkness of my lonely room... ♪ 369 00:20:39,613 --> 00:20:41,865 Wow. Ryan and Tanner, huh? 370 00:20:41,949 --> 00:20:43,325 Yikes. 371 00:20:43,951 --> 00:20:48,830 It's a good thing that you and I have such a healthy relationship, right? 372 00:20:51,583 --> 00:20:55,212 Okay, look, I'm sorry about my freak-out earlier. 373 00:20:56,296 --> 00:20:59,716 I just don't know why, all of a sudden, you're dying to date me. 374 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,051 We had a good thing going. 375 00:21:02,052 --> 00:21:06,139 Look, I've been around enough girls 376 00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:11,895 to know how rare it is to actually connect with someone, and you and I, we have it. 377 00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:13,981 You know we do. 378 00:21:15,190 --> 00:21:17,276 Okay, but what if we break up? 379 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,653 Then it's just bye-bye to a lifelong friendship? 380 00:21:20,237 --> 00:21:25,367 Ravi, my life is Chernobyl-levels of toxic right now. 381 00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:30,205 - You're the only thing that doesn't suck. - Look, I feel the same way. 382 00:21:30,706 --> 00:21:34,501 Also, it's been 25 years. 383 00:21:34,584 --> 00:21:37,212 I've had so many opportunities to ghost you. 384 00:21:38,046 --> 00:21:42,718 That's 25 consecutive years of wanting to be around you, 385 00:21:42,801 --> 00:21:44,803 and I'm not going anywhere. 386 00:21:46,471 --> 00:21:47,471 I promise. 387 00:21:53,562 --> 00:21:54,855 Oh, that's good. 388 00:21:56,940 --> 00:21:58,525 - Shit. - Hmm. 389 00:21:59,484 --> 00:22:02,112 Our parents are gonna be so happy about this. 390 00:22:15,667 --> 00:22:16,877 Sorry, um... 391 00:22:18,128 --> 00:22:20,547 I need to do a wellness check on us again. Are we okay? 392 00:22:21,548 --> 00:22:23,800 Yeah, we're fine. It's just, um... 393 00:22:24,384 --> 00:22:26,678 Wow. Our origin story. 394 00:22:26,762 --> 00:22:30,640 - Didn't realize how depressing that was. - Come on. It wasn't that bad. 395 00:22:30,724 --> 00:22:34,519 It wasn't really that great either, Tanner. I mean... 396 00:22:34,603 --> 00:22:38,315 If I had known that I couldn't see you at all when Richard was in town, I... 397 00:22:38,398 --> 00:22:39,816 - Okay, yeah. - It would've... 398 00:22:39,900 --> 00:22:42,152 Yeah, I'm sorry. I should've told you sooner. 399 00:22:42,235 --> 00:22:44,446 But it was brand-spanking new to me. 400 00:22:44,529 --> 00:22:46,948 I was essentially managing two relationships. 401 00:22:47,908 --> 00:22:52,245 But what about the fact that I basically had to demand that you break up with me? 402 00:22:52,329 --> 00:22:55,582 I mean, that was pretty selfish. Right? 403 00:22:55,665 --> 00:22:57,959 Oh, I'm selfish? 404 00:23:01,630 --> 00:23:02,714 That's hysterical. 405 00:23:03,924 --> 00:23:05,384 What's that supposed to mean? 406 00:23:07,928 --> 00:23:10,180 Tanner! What's that supposed to mean? 407 00:23:10,263 --> 00:23:12,724 - Nothing. Let's just get ready for bed. - No! Tell me. 408 00:23:12,808 --> 00:23:15,769 Ryan, breaking news, you're the selfish one. 409 00:23:15,852 --> 00:23:18,772 I blew up my life for you, and now it's like you're over it. 410 00:23:19,856 --> 00:23:24,444 Okay, I never asked you to end things with Richard, okay? That was your choice. 411 00:23:24,528 --> 00:23:25,821 And I'm not over it. 412 00:23:25,904 --> 00:23:28,990 Come on. You've been acting distant. You were gone half the day. 413 00:23:29,074 --> 00:23:31,243 Yeah, working on a piece about my disability 414 00:23:31,326 --> 00:23:33,912 that I'm very passionate about. 415 00:23:33,995 --> 00:23:36,164 I was a backup dancer for Ciara, Ryan. 416 00:23:36,248 --> 00:23:38,500 I understand being passionate about something. 417 00:23:41,503 --> 00:23:43,422 I'm sorry, was that supposed to be a joke? 418 00:23:43,505 --> 00:23:45,799 No, it wasn't. But thank you for laughing. 419 00:23:45,882 --> 00:23:49,761 You know, statistically speaking, it's way harder to be a backup dancer 420 00:23:49,845 --> 00:23:51,930 than a fucking blogger. Just saying. 421 00:24:05,235 --> 00:24:06,653 My mom doesn't like you. 422 00:24:07,612 --> 00:24:10,907 Oh. I got a bad review from your mom. Fabulous. 423 00:24:11,783 --> 00:24:13,201 What did she say? 424 00:24:13,285 --> 00:24:15,871 - Nothing. - No, tell me what she said. 425 00:24:16,496 --> 00:24:19,374 Fine. She said you were a little simple. 426 00:24:19,458 --> 00:24:20,709 Simple? Wow. 427 00:24:21,918 --> 00:24:25,297 - Coming from a woman with those curtains. - What's wrong with her curtains? 428 00:24:25,380 --> 00:24:27,299 They're underwhelming. I was underwhelmed. 429 00:24:27,799 --> 00:24:30,635 You're such a mama's boy. You two are obsessed with each other. 430 00:24:30,719 --> 00:24:33,263 Correction. We used to be obsessed with each other. 431 00:24:33,346 --> 00:24:35,223 Now we're in a really healthy place. 432 00:24:35,307 --> 00:24:36,391 Hmm. 433 00:24:36,475 --> 00:24:39,311 Tanner, you don't get it, okay. At Crip Prom... 434 00:24:39,394 --> 00:24:42,355 Oh my God! I knew you were still pissed about that. 435 00:24:42,439 --> 00:24:44,608 Well, yeah. I tried not to be, okay? 436 00:24:44,691 --> 00:24:46,902 But you basically said, "Don't worry, 437 00:24:46,985 --> 00:24:49,714 I don't have to be part of this hugely important aspect of your life." 438 00:24:49,738 --> 00:24:52,324 "Why don't you just do your thing and I'll do mine?" 439 00:24:52,407 --> 00:24:55,619 You made it clear how much my presence was just fucking everything up. 440 00:24:55,702 --> 00:24:57,037 I was offering a solution. 441 00:24:57,120 --> 00:25:00,499 I don't want to be with someone I have to section out parts of my life for. 442 00:25:00,582 --> 00:25:02,584 I want you to be a part of everything. 443 00:25:02,667 --> 00:25:06,004 Fine, then I'll be a part of it. I love you, Ryan. 444 00:25:06,087 --> 00:25:07,506 Do you? 445 00:25:11,301 --> 00:25:13,136 I can't believe you just asked me that. 446 00:25:15,180 --> 00:25:16,223 Fuck, where's my phone? 447 00:25:18,350 --> 00:25:22,062 I'm just saying, if you think about it, we don't really know each other that well. 448 00:25:22,145 --> 00:25:25,023 Are you fucking kidding me, Ryan? Where is this coming from? 449 00:25:25,774 --> 00:25:27,234 Tanner, you just... 450 00:25:28,026 --> 00:25:29,861 You don't understand my disability. 451 00:25:29,945 --> 00:25:32,864 Maybe that wouldn't have mattered a year ago, but now it does. 452 00:25:32,948 --> 00:25:37,410 You don't let me understand it. I'm sorry, I don't have a PhD in disability rights. 453 00:25:37,494 --> 00:25:40,747 - You gotta explain things to me. - I don't wanna fucking explain things. 454 00:25:40,830 --> 00:25:43,917 I explain things every day. I don't want to have to do that with you. 455 00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:45,585 Fine! Don't explain things. 456 00:25:45,669 --> 00:25:48,713 Just let me fuck up again and again, so you can feel victimized. 457 00:25:49,714 --> 00:25:51,132 - Fuck you. - Fuck you too. 458 00:25:54,219 --> 00:25:55,220 I'm going to bed. 459 00:26:07,774 --> 00:26:08,774 Good night. 460 00:26:10,235 --> 00:26:11,235 Good night. 461 00:26:17,158 --> 00:26:18,158 I love you. 462 00:26:25,959 --> 00:26:27,377 I think we need to break up. 463 00:27:13,798 --> 00:27:15,967 ♪ Now that you're gone ♪ 464 00:27:16,885 --> 00:27:20,930 ♪ All that's left is a band of gold ♪ 465 00:27:21,473 --> 00:27:25,310 ♪ All that's left of the dreams I hold ♪ 466 00:27:25,393 --> 00:27:28,104 ♪ Is a band of gold ♪ 467 00:27:28,188 --> 00:27:32,609 ♪ And the memories of what love could be ♪ 468 00:27:32,692 --> 00:27:36,988 ♪ If you were still here with me ♪ 469 00:27:49,918 --> 00:27:50,918 Hi, honey. 470 00:27:51,294 --> 00:27:52,294 Hi. 471 00:27:55,131 --> 00:27:56,883 Okay, so, update. 472 00:27:57,884 --> 00:28:01,012 Ravi and I are dating. Or we're trying to date. 473 00:28:01,096 --> 00:28:03,473 I'll take no further questions at this time. 474 00:28:04,140 --> 00:28:05,140 That's great. 475 00:28:09,312 --> 00:28:10,312 You okay, boo? 476 00:28:14,526 --> 00:28:15,526 Oh, hey. 477 00:28:18,613 --> 00:28:21,700 - Do you wanna talk about it? - No. 478 00:28:25,453 --> 00:28:28,164 Oh, I've never been in the back seat. 479 00:28:28,748 --> 00:28:29,833 Oh, it's comfy. 480 00:28:34,003 --> 00:28:35,964 Head east towards Hayden Avenue. 481 00:28:36,047 --> 00:28:39,926 You know, it took us so long to get on the road this morning, 482 00:28:40,009 --> 00:28:44,723 uh, it almost made me want to say, "Why is no one ready?" 483 00:28:47,142 --> 00:28:48,977 What? Did I not get it? 484 00:28:50,145 --> 00:28:51,896 Uh, 'cause I practiced. 485 00:28:51,980 --> 00:28:54,733 ♪ Haven't felt right in a week ♪ 486 00:28:54,816 --> 00:28:58,778 ♪ And I'm thinning out ♪ 487 00:28:58,862 --> 00:29:00,363 ♪ And it hurts bad ♪ 488 00:29:01,990 --> 00:29:03,783 ♪ I gotta get back ♪ 489 00:29:06,745 --> 00:29:09,372 ♪ Hot head and dreamless sleep ♪ 490 00:29:09,456 --> 00:29:12,917 ♪ I could just slip down ♪ 491 00:29:13,001 --> 00:29:14,794 ♪ And on the wrong track ♪ 492 00:29:16,463 --> 00:29:18,173 ♪ I gotta get back ♪