What happened, mister?
I got robbed, sir.
Where?
Home.
Where was the building security guard at the time?
No, not at home.
It happened outside the building.
Don't cook up stories, you'll get caught.
Sir, I stepped out to buy medicines.
On my way back,
I got mugged.
In which area?
Under the Matunga flyover.
What time?
At night…
3:00 a.m.
Okay. We'll investigate this and let you know tomorrow.
Okay, sir.
Take care.
This city has become so unsafe, right?
I mean, not just for women--
Why are you protecting him?
If he loved you, he wouldn't hurt you.
He won't be able to see you like this.
Can someone please put some sense into him?!
This is abuse and we must report it.
Mel, Lavu is right.
The cops are also involved now.
I think you should tell them what happened.
Preeto, where have you been?
You know how badly I need you.
Sorry, I've just--
Still on?
I don't know.
I'm really confused.
Pity fuck?
Self-pity!
I have my lonely nights, Lav.
What's wrong?
We're fighting a lot.
-Do you think I'm doing the right thing? -Of course, you are!
Both of you are perfect for each other and always have been.
I think it's this whole wedding thing.
It's just getting to me and
now I just can't wait for it to get over.
Maybe you're so stressed
because you're trying to take control of too many things.
Let go a little bit.
You don't have to bite everyone's head off.
Spare someone at least.
Go on a date with Rishabh?
You guys were so cute in college.
Yeah.
-Hello? -Should I say hello to your sister?
If you dare touch Melroy again, I'll fuck your happiness.
Who is this?
Your dad!
If your dad finds out why you make frequent trips to Bombay,
he'll come here and get you married, asshole!
Give my regards to Uncle.
Motherfucker.
Hey! Let go!
Else I'll tickle you.
Come here.
Let me go!
Hey, what's this?
I WANT YOUR BODY
GO ON AND MASTURBATE
PLEASE
What are you doing here?
Why are you here?
I just…
I need a break.
From the relationship?
No, you fool!
From this whole wedding madness.
Are you okay?
Come with me.
-Fine, let me get the bike keys. -Not the bike.
I want to go on a date with my college lover.
Please.
-You mean the world to me -Stop.
-You're the one I want -Wait, just a minute.
-Stand here. -The one I want to spend my nights with
You and I… are one
My love
-You're the right one for me -Two half-glasses, please.
-My right, my wrong -We'll fall sick if we have this.
This is where we'd fallen in love too.
What if he has beaten him up so badly,
that he's hiding him now?
I feel the same.
Hang on, Mr. Pitroda has a dog, right?
So what?
A dog-walker goes to their house every day.
-So? -We can ask him about Melroy, baby.
How's Melroy and what's going on?
-Baby?! -Baby?!
I feel it, like it
I do want it, I so want it
This is worth it
I feel it, like it
Lavu, I'm sorry
about that night at the cafe
Baby, it's not about the money or the fucking app.
-It's about-- -It's about the house.
That's the bigger goal,
and in these three years, we've actually made one-fourth of it.
Dude, a sea-facing house.
-Yeah. -We should be able to afford
one in three years.
I think.
No man!
Promise.
I'm really sorry, Rishu.
I've been a first-class bitch to you.
You know what, I'm turned on by your temper.
And I… by your stupidity.
I feel it, like it
-I do want it, I so want it -I love you.
This is worth it
I feel it, like it I so want it, I don't want it
Kkrish Malhotra's Bandookbaaz 2 is this week's big release.
Say namaste.
Namaste.
Oh, fuck!
Let's hear what the audience has to say about the film.
This film is like Kkrish Malhotra taking a dump from a skyscraper!
They think the audience is foolish and drunk…
-Slow. -Such long dialogues
that lead to nothing.
The climax is useless!
I feel like setting the theater on fire.
They should give us a refund.
I'll give him fewer stars than the no. of Ks in his name!
Kkrish.
This isn't working.
What isn't?
I can't do this any longer.
Is it because my movie is going to flop?
What?!
No!
Who thinks like that? No!
You know what, I was dealing with my anxiety first.
Then I found you… twice!
And now you're dumping me.
And I can't even come to you for counseling.
What am I supposed to do?
I'll give you another counselor's number.
You know what,
my PR said, "If you want to be liked by the masses,
date a common girl."
You were my PR, so fuck you!
Fuck you!
Fucker.
Get out!
Good boy.
CHEETAHMAN TURNED OUT TO BE AN ANIMAL
TERRIBLE FILM, TERRIBLE PERSON
SUPER USELESS, NOT SUPERSTAR
HOW MUCH MONEY DO YOU WANT?
Hi.
Isn't this Mr. Pitroda's doggy?
-Mufasa. -Really?
Yes. I'm Mr. Pitroda's son, Melroy's friend Chiraunjimal.
Hello.
Where is Melroy nowadays?
I took the dog for a walk at night,
and when I got back, Melroy wasn't there.
Mr. Pitroda said he has gone to Pune for a week.
-What? -To Pune? Why?
I don't know.
I should leave now, Chiraunjimal.
I'm getting late.
Okay.
If you use my father's name again I'll…
You'll what?
Aunt May, don't you think green is his color?
I think, take these curtains, we'll make more clothes for you.
Mister.
-Yes, sir? -That boy, whose photo you recognized,
I beat him black and blue last night,
but the bugger refused to confess.
It's easy to get confessions in such cases, normally.
But this boy…
I don't understand why.
Was there something expensive in your wallet?
No, sir.
I see.
What do you want me to do?
Let him go, sir.
Have you lost your mind?
After all the work we've put in, you want us to let him go?
What's the real story?
Sir,
my boyfriend hit me.
What are you doing, sir?
You are the ones holding protest marches all the time.
-What's it called? LGBTQ-ABCD… -Please stop it, sir.
What about the innocent guy we've thrashed?
Who will hold a protest march for him?
The whole thing is over now.
This is a hospital and he is a patient.
You bloody rainbow freak threw that poor guy under the bus!
Please leave now. He is a patient.
Give it back.
What are you doing?
What are you doing?!
It's okay.
No, it's not okay.
And you don't seem to understand that.
-Show us some more. -This is…
this is now. Very recent.
And these are real.
-These are real? -They are.
-Could you zoom in… -Guys…
You're living the life, Arjun.
-Right. -Fuck, wow!
I'm stuck with the same since 2010. Summer, winter…
Aayat's here now so…
So your hand gets some rest?
He's been at it non-stop.
Motherfucker!
Since childhood…
I'm playing the same fucking video game, fucker.
Really?
And was it your dad who went to Bangkok?
Papa doesn't go to Bangkok.
Hello,
-my dad doesn't go to Bangkok. -Really?
Papa goes to Russia.
Uncle is a dude, man! Uncle is having fun!
Uncle…
-Uncle… -Yes, Lavender?
Listen, I'm going to Mom's.
-What happened? -Nothing.
The usual.
She had a breakup.
Shit!
I can be there in half an hour.
No, I'll handle it.
You sure?
Okay, love you.
So, Papa was saying…
Mom,
got you some chips and doughnuts.
Get in, everyone. Get close.
Yes, Lavu?
Listen, code red.
Anish is going to Italy for a year.
Mom doesn't want to do long-distance anymore.
Okay. Should I come over?
No, don't worry. I'll handle it.
Think I'll just stay in tonight.
Cool.
Should I come over?
Shut up.
Bro.
Thank you, man.
Is this the first time someone paid for your drinks?
Not about that, you take so much care of Ma.
Hey! Fuck off.
Fuck off.
You would've done the same if my mom was in Canada too, right?
So?
Okay fine.
Wait, hear me out.
Are you sleepy?
-No. -Want to go for a ride?
Yes. Sit.
Not on a bike. I get chased, man.
Who chases you?
People.
I don't think I'm gonna be falling in love again.
I'm so done!
Didn't the doctor say the same thing?
I'm nearing menopause.
How does it matter?
Just feels like the end of an era.
And so soon!
There's so much I wanted to do.
Knowing you, Mom.
You'll do it anyway.
There's nothing stopping you.
Do you want to watch something nice?
Yeah.
Slasher movie maybe.
Is he answering?
Shahid!
Come down!
The whole street will wake up. What's wrong with you?
-You look so cute! -Let's go!
-Youth will soon pass us by -Let's make her drink all the wine.
This moment is all that we've got To live our friendship
Youth will soon pass us by
Melroy!
-This moment is all that we've got -He isn't here as well.
To live our friendship
'Cause all you need is real love Real friends, real life
Now that I've loved and lost, I realize
The ones who're there When you're low or high
Know their worth
'Cause all you need is real love Real friends, real life
Now that I've loved and lost, I realize
The ones who're there When you're low or high
Know their worth
Youth will soon pass us by
This moment is all that we've got To live our friendship
You're my victory, you're my defeat
You're my love, my friend
You're my victory, you're my defeat
You're my love, my friend
If I don't have you, this life
With all its gifts it means nothing
Youth will soon pass us by…
It's very late, we'll look for Melroy in the morning.
…that we've got To live our friendship
The doggy in our school, Socket…
-was… -In a weird mood.
He ran out of the gate while we were playing with him and…
He was hit by a bike coming at full speed.
We took some money from our teacher and…
We took him to the vet.
-He… -Was seriously hurt.
Thank God he didn't propose to me like this.
Whose idea is this?
Everything looks so pink.
I paid a lot of money for it.
You look so pretty.
Thank you.
Listen, I want this for my proposal.
-Hold up! -Wow!
Is this a new tattoo?
You didn't see it on my story?
Of course, I did.
I posted it on my story.
Beautiful.
Guys, Shahid keeps disconnecting my call.
I think it's performance pressure.
He's doing all this to get laid.
-Good for him. -But people marry just to get laid.
-There you go. -No!
Even though I'm getting married, I don't get laid!
What? Lavu?
-Ever? -Neither do I.
-You get my pain, bro. -I know.
-Sexless lot! -You won't understand, bro.
-You, let it be! -You, let it be!
Preet, is that psycho on steroids suing you?
-Don't know. Don't care. -Nice.
You and I just attract all the psychos, don't we?
Listen, Shahid and his queen are coming or not?
-Phone is switched off. -The queen has run away.
So has the king.
-Oh shit! -Oh no!
What happened, Shahid?
Nothing much, Dad got drunk and hit me again.
So sorry, man.
Who will come to save me?
You're a strong guy.
Shahid, let's bunk school today.
-You, don't get him into trouble. -Baby…
just trust me.
Since you called me "baby", fine.
What's so "fine" here?
I'm the one who gets beaten up at home.
-Come on. -Let's go.
Baby?!
-Get back! -Just a minute.
When you walk tick-tock-tick
All eyes are on you-you-you
-I swear-swear-swear on you -Swear on you
When you walk tick-tock-tick…
-I have a husband. -What?
I have a husband.
He just came back from the US,
we're trying to work things out. I may go back.
Leave it at bay
Your swag, sweetheart
Don't go out looking like the way you do
-Leave it at bay-- -Stop. Stop!
Shut up, Ajju!
She's not feeling too well.
The fuck!
Shahid, what's going on?
Shahid, this isn't…
We barely know each other.
And I told you what's happening.
Told you what?
Her husband is back.
She has a husband.
They're working it out.
I can't… I can't do this.
I'm so sorry, everyone.
I'm gonna go.
-I'll… -I can drop you.
I'll get a cab.
Okay, sorry.
She has a husband.
She just told me.
What a bloody fool I am!
Here's your Maggi.
It's not your fault.
It's my shit luck.
I've been wanting to quit school,
I stayed back only because she joined,
fucking hoping for love.
Fuck love! Why do you need love?
You have your friends,
you're not alone.
I am alone.
You're the only one who's there for me.
And you also call me when no one else answers your call!
You know that's not true.
It's fucking true.
No one has ever called me and asked,
"Hey, Shahid, how are you?
Are you okay?"
That's because everyone thinks you are.
I'm not!
I'm not.
I'm sorry.
You're a dear friend to us, Shahid.
You know that.
This "us" that you're referring to,
I'm not a part of it.
You're saying this because you're angry.
Nobody's ever made you feel this way.
Okay, man. Fuck it.
Fine.
I really fucking thought she was the one.
Cutes, you are the one.
Everyone else is the other one.
Great line, but I can't afford to pay you for it.
Want some more Maggi?
Sure.
Eat the yogurt.
Know what…
I had a great time in Mussoorie.
Why?
I've been lying to you.
I thought you'll feel bad.
Why now?
Because I don't want any secrets between us.
Want to know a secret?
I really wanted to go to Mussoorie.
Better be okay, bastard.
What do you mean?
If the girl tells you she has a husband when you're proposing to her,
-how will you feel? -Yeah, bro.
He has a hard life. It can't be helped.
Let's go.
-Let's go. -Fuck.
Fuck!
-What's wrong? -What's wrong?
I've lost my money.
-What money? -The money I'd invested in the app.
Is this the one we'd spoken about, Rishabh?
Give it.
Rishabh, is this the house fund?
Is this our house fund, Rishabh?
I'm figuring it out, Lavanya.
What the actual fuck!
The app was to go live today,
but the investors have pulled out at the last minute
and sent me a message right now, baby.
I'm figuring it out, okay?
-I'm figuring-- -I've been telling you for months… years,
not to invest in these stupid apps.
You have such a big ego that you refuse to listen!
Thank you so much.
You're welcome…
for losing our future home.
Rishabh, you're so--
This plan of yours was fuck all, to begin with, Lavanya.
Calm down, Rishabh.
That we have to buy a house in our thirties!
Can't live in a rented place.
What's the fucking big deal?
If we can't afford it now, we can buy a house in our forties.
Listen, guys. We'll figure something out.
I'm going to handle this, bro…
-Arjun, drop us both home. -But why? My bike is parked right there.
Leave the bike here.
I'm getting married in a week.
-You're not driving that bike drunk! -That's not happening, bro.
-Let's go. -We're broke also now, let's go home.
Don't be fuck all now, Lavanya.
Did you just call me fuck all?
You lost our house money to a stupid app--
-Oh my, God. I am fucking sorry! -No, you're not! You're not.
-Take her home, Arjun. -Please sit in the car.
Why won't you listen to me?
-Take her home. -Sit in the car.
Arjun, I need a ride to clear my head.
-I'm going home. -Fine. Go!
-I'll go in the car-- -Go!
You're drunk, what are you even doing?
I'm not fucking drunk, okay!
-Come on, please… -Shut up.
Rishabh.